Tuesday, 23 April 2013

Dear Old Me,

I'd like to say I'm sorry it has come to this but I have to say it. Well, write it really, I just want to tell you this without hurting you or getting it wrong so I'm writing to you.

I don't think we can live together anymore.  I want to break up. I want a divorce. The only way either of us can survive is if we end this relationship for good. 

Honestly, it's not you, it's me.  I've changed. I still admire you, all you have been through, all you have ovecome.  I still love and care for you. But we will tear each other apart the longer we try to stay together. I can't live that way anymore. There isn't anybody else, I'm just so unhappy and you are unhappy too, I know. We have had so many years together that have been happy, our whole lives in fact,  and I have to say if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be here today. But things have changed.

I can't pretend to like sitting down all day to watch movies. You have to have noticed I can't sit still that long any more.  I can't stay up all hours of the night on the computer or in front of the television.  I can't eat the food we used to eat anymore.....it makes me sick. I have tried to spare your feelings for so long but I can't hide it any longer.

I need to run, I need to lift, I need to feel the sun in my hair and the wind in my face. I need to move. I need to eat real food and feed my body rather than feed my sadnesses. I need to LIVE, beyond just merely sitting down until I die. And I need to show our children how to do the same. It is for this reason I have taken the children with me. They will remember you and I will make sure they know who you are.

Please forget about me and move on. I will always remember you as the one who created me, supported me, made me what I am today. I will remember our time with love. I hope you find the happiness I now have, for yourself. 

Yours Sincerely

New Me.

1 comment:

  1. Feeding your body, not your saddness. I LOVE this letter to you old self from your new self. Found your blog through the 12WBT forum thread.